ProblemA

It has been one “need to write this in my blog” week. Nope. My life is still the same – it’s as exciting as stale bread. Nga lang – this week – medyo may mga gumalaw sa bread. Parang medyo nabangga or inikot. May kaunting mga pangayayari ba.

I learned a couple of incidents that made me feel sad. First was the death of the brother of a dear friend. Kahit hindi naman kami close nung brother nya – we sometimes see him nung panay ang tambay naming magbabarkada sa bahay nila. Friend – again , my condolences. Just this morning naman – I received a mail from another friend. She’s 6 weeks pregnant na – kaya lang nalaman nya na the baby inside her is already dead. Ayun – as expected – she’s devastated. It’s her 2^nd na anak sana. I called her up just to chat. I made it a point not to say stupid things such as … okay lang yan.. or isipin mo na lang na angel na sya … get my drift? Ang sabi ko lang – ganyan talaga ang buhay… may mga bagay na hindi natin kayang i-control. Sabi nga – bad things happen to good people. Wala na tayong magawa.

Yesterday naman – was my Mom’s death anniversary… kasabay din ito ng 1^st year death anniversary ng nanay ng housemate ko. Hay naku. Years have passed – but I still miss my Mom. And there’s nothing like death anniversaries to make you remember that someone you so loved is already gone. Hay naku. Ano ba naman itong week na to. Puro pagkawala ang nangyayari.

Kahapon din – my Dad sent me an sms saying na nasa bahay ang Lola at Tita ko sa mother side. Nagpunta sila sa cemetery – lighted candles and offered prayers. Aside from that – may dala rin silang medyo hindi kagandahang news — I don’t have the full details yet as I am yet to talk to my Dad. Sabihin na lang natin na it involves properties and money. Naku. Problema ko na naman ito. May idea na ako actually — as I am already expecting that sooner or later maiisip nila yung piece of land sa likod ng bahay namin. The land is owned by my mom’s brother na unfortunately couple of years ago ay na-stroke. I know that they are in dire need of money – kaya naisip ko na darating ang time that they will sell it. Since nasa likod ng bahay namin –and may mga ilang structures na rin kaming naitayo – there’s not other choice but for me to buy the lot. Hay – and I was just mentioning few blogs ago of my financial standing. Anyway – not to go ahead …. Hintayin kong makausap ang aking butihing ama bago ko tunay na problemahin ito.

The above paragraphs all describes the bad news and problema na dumating sa akin ngayong week na ito. What surprises me is my attitude towards it. I was sad for the death of my dear friends loved ones – but I am also thankful that my family are okay. I am sad that my mom is no longer with me – but I am thankful that my Dad still is — kahit na I don’t agree with his decisions most of the times. I am on the edge with the unplanned need for a large sum of money — but I am thankful that I still have the capability to earn money. I am thankful na ang proproblemahin ko lang ngayon – ay pera. Unlike my friends who lost their loved ones. Kung iisipin kasi — madali naman masolusyunan ang problema sa pera. Pero ang pagkawala ng mga minamahal — walang solusyon dyan. The sadness will diminish in time — diminish – but won’t go away. It will always be with you – maybe until its your time to go.

Conversations

R: Musta naman dyan?
G: Eto bored. Naiirita ako sa Facebook. Ikaw?

R: Eto. Walang facebook account. Bored. Nagmumuni-muni ng failures sa buhay. J

G: Ano ba! Ako naman busy-busyhan sa homecoming namin sa Feb next year

R: Homecoming? College? My golly. Sign of old age ang mga homecoming homecoming na yan. Hehehe. Hindi naman siguro golden anniversary yan?

G: Gage! Silver pa lang ng High School classmates. Di pa ko busy sa shoots e.

R: Hahaha. Still. 25 years na pala since high school mo! Pag ganyang mga okasyon – can’t help but wonder – ano kaya ang iisipin nila Successful ba ako or failure? Reunion ang 2^nd na most stressful na okasyon.

G: Ano be? Mas na-stress na ako sa Facebook. Mahirap lang makibagay sa marami. Iba-iba ugali ng classmates. May ayaw magpatalo at ayaw malamangan. Nakakatawa at ang cheap!

R: Bakit ka na-stress sa Facebook.

G: Di pa kasi ako familiar. May point system pa at kung ano-ano.

R: Hehehe. Kaya dapat stick ka na lang sa Friendster. Matingnan nga yang facebook na yan minsan.

G: Hmp. I’m sure meron ka na. E ikaw? Kamusta ka?

R: Eto. Wala pang Facebook account. Bored. Financially challenged. Hindi pa rin pumapayat. In other words same-same.

G: Pareho lang tayo noh. Nagmimid-life crisin na nga ako e. Take it easy.

R: Quarter life crisis lang ako. Hahahaha. Dinadaan ko na lang sa kapapanood ng TFC. Para tipid.

G: Sabihin ko pa naman na mag-Bohol or Palawan tayo. Di lang tipid. Hahaha.

R: Palawan? Bohol? E start na nga raw ng rainy season dyan. Baka bagyuhin tayo. Sa December tayo mag-Palawan! Sana makauwi ako! Hay. Magpa-burger ka naman! Buger! Burger!

G: Hahaha! Sige. Basta sa Jollibee!

R: Sure! Miss ko na Jollibee!

G: Sige! J Uwi ka na!

R: 8 uwi na ako. Invite na lang kita pag may Facebook account na ako. Itulog mo na lang yang midlife crisis mo!

G: Ikain na lang kaya! J

R: Pwede rin! Kaso paano makakapag-two-piece sa December?

Wandering Thoughts

Natatamad na naman akong magtrabaho. Correction pala — nagtratrabaho ako… I’m trying out this front-end  system na ginagamit ng mga users… and I lost my patience. Kung ano-anong error lumalabas. Kainis. Walang kwenta ang mga messages na pinapakita. Hmp. Branch required daw – wala namang input field for Branch! Pag di ko pa tinigilan ito – baka makarinig na lang bigla ang lahat ng tunog na ibinatong monitor. No wonder ayaw ng mga users mag-test! Hmp.

Pag mga ganitong sitwasyon — para hindi ako mahigh-blood…. I just let my mind wonder… nakatingin lang ako sa monitor (na dapat magpasalamat dahil hindi ko siya ibinato)… letting my mind go wherever it wants to go. I listed down some of the things na niliparan ng aking pagmumuni-muni…..

 

1. Ano kaya ang surname nina Dexter at DeeDee? Hindi naman siguro Laboratory no?

2.  Ano kaya ang full birth date ni Harry Potter?

3. Bakit Harry James Potter ang full name ni Harry? Bakit hindi Harry Evans Potter since Lily Evans ang maiden name ng Nanay niya?

4. Kung ang matira na lang kaya sa bahay ni kuya ay sina Robi, Rona, Ejay, at Nan –  may manonood pa kaya?

5. Bakit kaya sa Lobo – pag nagtratransform from human to wolf – nawawala yung damit? San napupunta?  

6. Bakit kaya ang mga anaps – ang hilig magholding hands kahit kapwa sila lalaki? Sweet lang ba talaga sila sa isa’t-isa?

7. Kung magiging X-men kaya ako sino ang gusto kong mutant power – si Wolverine o si Cyclops. Okay sana si Wolverine kasi he can heal himself .. kaya lang maganda mga shades ni Cyclops e.

8. Kung kaya ni Wolverine na i-heal yung external na body nya – kaya rin kaya niyang kayang iheal yung mga internal organs nya? Ibig sabihin ba nito – hindi sya magkaka-ulcer kahit lagi syang nalilipasan ng gutom?

9. Bakit kaya ang mga Pinoy superheroes kailangan pang gumawa ng kung ano-ano bago magtransform. Kailangan pa ng bato, barbel, bawang, itlog etc..etc.

10. Kung kailangan ni Captain Barbell na mag-travel via airplane — ilagay nya kaya ang barbell nya sa hand carry or i-check in?

11. I know  I’ll never love this way again. So I keep holding on. Before the good is gone….. lalalala… hmm..

12. Kailan kaya nararanasan ang midlife crisis? Kasi hindi mo naman alam kung kailan ka mamamatay di ba? If you do experience the signs of mid-life crisis at the age of 40 — ibig sabihin dapat 80 ka mamatay? 

13. Bakit kaya ang Meralco — pinababayaran sa mamamayan ang cost ng electricity lost (due to nakaw etc). Kasalanan ba ng mga nagbabayad na nanakawan sila? Bakit  dun naman sa SM – pag may nag-shop lift – hindi naman sinisingil sa paying customers yung cost nung na-shoplift? Kung dagdagan kaya ng Meralco yung guardiya nila? 

14. Whatcha doing?

15. Umuwi  kaya ako sa Pinas? Parang masarap mag-Bora. Hmmm.

16. Sweldo na pala bukas! Galit na kaya yung mga pinagkakautangan ko?

17. Bakit kaya parang galit si Mariel kagabi sa PBB Teen Edition Plus? Malamang inaway ni Bianca. At si Bianca ang may kasalanan.

18. Hmm. Ano na nga ba yung huling movie na napanood ko?

19. Parang masarap ang daing na galunggong. Saka munggo. San kaya pwede makabili nun.

20. Nung unang panahon kaya – hindi rin accepted sa society ang may bad breath?

21. Bakit kaya tinawag na Monitor ang monitor? Bakit hindi  Viewer? Or  TV like something. Bakit monitor? Hmm.. Dahil sa mino-monitor mo ito? Bakit ang TV hindi Monitor?

 

Naku…. 8:00 p.m. na pala. Uwian na.  Muntik na akong maging-OT! Titigilan ko na itong pagmumuni-muni.  Bukas na lang ulit! J

Update Lang

 

Matagal na rin akong di nagsusulat kung ano ano ang mga pinapakinggan kong mga kanta nowadays. Malamang na hindi ka interesado – pero dahil naisip ko na i-share ito — wala ka nang magagawa pa. Kung ayaw mo malaman – wag mo basahin ang blog entry na ito. Wala namang pumipilit sa iyo…Madali lang naman ang solusyon di ba?

1.  Bleeding for Leona Lewis. A friend was always mentioning this Bleeding Love song and I haven’t heard the song. In American Idol couple of weeks ago – Leona Lewis performed this song live and I was not that impress. I informed this friend that it was okay.. it was not an amazing performance.. just okay (ala Simon Cowell). This friend suggested that I check out the MTV of the song … pang-second opinion ba. Dahil sa masunurin at mabait akong bata – I did search for the MTV in You Tube. I can’t remember now what the MTV is about – but it did change my opinion on the song. It is a good. I even downloaded it in my Ipod.  Life’s lesson — everybody do deserve a second chance. Maybe a good surprise will be waiting if you do.

2.  I am now discovering the music of Rascal Flatts. This group is not known to me until a couple of days ago. I saw one You Tube video wherein the song What Hurts the Most (from the album Me and My Gang) was used as the background music. I instantly loved the song. I did some research and found out that they also sang Life is a Highway – from the Disney movie Cars. I downloaded 5 of their albums in my Ipod and have been listening to it the whole day today. Life’s realization — I used to think that country songs are only for old people or true blue cowboys. I am definitely no Marlboro man — therefore — I am o… .. ol…. hmmm.. Country music are for everyone pala! Trip-trip lang kung baga.        

3. Another new find for me is the band The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. I have been listening to the song Your Guardian Angel (from the album Don’t Fake It) over and over and over again. Nakaka-addict e.  Medyo surprising na nagustuhan ko itong kanta na to — kasi may mga parts na medyo maingay ito. Lam nyo naman pag medyo o…ol…. Hmm… sophisticated ang choice of music — may certain level of ingay lang ang kayang itolerate.  Life’s lesson —  Songs of the younger generation does not always equate to noise pollution. Well – most of them are – pero paminsan minsan – may mga matitino din naman. Kaya dapat – we should try to give it a chance. Hinaan nyo na lang muna ang sound…… para iwas ear damage!    

4.  I was watching PBB Teen Edition Plus — and there’s this song na laging pinapatugtog pag may mga moments ang NicoSef or YoNic or whatever they want to call this loveteam. It was a nice song…. yung smooth lang …. Simple… walang masyadong palabok na mga sounds or makapatid litid na notes. Sa tulong ni Mr. Google — I learned that the song is Realize by Colbie Caillat (from the album Coco).  Life’s realization — The Album Coco is perfect for quiet afternoons… tambay sa Starbucks… just you, your café latte grande, your favorite magazine and Coco.   

Ayan ang aking update. Malamang lahat ng sinabi kong kanta ay alam nyo na. Kung alam nyo na – mainam…. Kung hindi pa – you can check it our.. or not…. Hindi ako affected dyan. Iba-iba naman kasi ang trip ng mga tao when it comes to music. Kaya mahirap ipagpilitan na pakinggan or gustuhin nyo ang mga ito.  So.. paano? Sa muling music update na lang ulit. Kailan yun? Ewan.  

 

Guarding the Guardians

Usapang PBB Teen Edition Plus pa rin. One of the big Plus for this season are the inclusion of the Guardians. Each teen will have one parent or guardian. The teens initially have no idea that the guardians are their “kapitbahay”. I was not initially thrilled of this idea. Isip ko lang – how can the teens be independent (well… independent in Kuya’s dictionary). Isa pa – ano naman ang gagawin nitong mga gurang na to. Pang-gulo lang itong mga to.

Surprisingly – having the guardians inside worked real well. It sort of allowed us to have a glimpse of who our parents are. Madaling maka-relate dahil most of the guardians belong to the same class that we and our parents belong to. Seeing them is like learning what your parents have gone through/have been going through without you knowing about it. Siguro nga – as a parent marami ka talagang dapat ilihim sa mga anak mo to protect them.

Well – aside from this learning and knowing crap —- nakaka-aliw din kasi madalas silang mag-away-away. Yup – the fangs are not on the teens but on the guardians. Hindi pa nakuntento sa fangs — may dagdag pa na claws. Parang nalipat ditto ang mga Black Lobo. Boring naman kung lahat sila ay mabait at nagkakasundo. Kung sa Sesame Street nga may issues – sa PBB house pa kaya.

Dahil sa matatanda na sila – fine—may edad na sila — fixed na ang kanilang mga beliefs. Medyo hirap na rin siguro silang makisama. Syempre nandyan din yung pagkainip at stress. With all these factors – what can you expect. Syempre fireworks. Kevin’s dad – John is such a strong character. Nung una nakakatuwa — pero ngayon – nakakasuya na. He’s loud. He’s arrogant. He has no respect. Josef’s aunt – Anna is another character everyone loves to hate. And I don’t blame them – I hate her as well. She’s controlling, authoritative and all-knowing. Si John laging pumaprimetime! Si Anna mahilig magmaganda! Kaya ayun – lagi sila nag-aaway.

Wala namang issue kung mag-away sila. Maganda nga yun – para may papanoorin tayo. However – the last banggaan between Anna and John is rather disturbing. Josef was with the guardians. Wake up call na si Kuya pero hindi pa rin tumayo si Josef. Ginising sya ni John pero wa-epek…. second wake-up call specifically for Josef…ginising ulit ni John… wa-epek pa rin. Third wake-up call — ayan na – nagsimula na si motor mouth John. Ginising nya ulit si Josef — sabay bigay ng mga panglinis ng glass. Meron pa siyang speech na hindi senyorito si Josef or something to that effect. Pero hindi pa sya dun natapos — he kept on picking on Josef para maligo… pagkatapos maligo.. utos na maglinis ng salamin… utos na mag-hugas ng pinggan. All this with matching dakdak na hindi senyorito si Josef.. mahiya naman dahil yung iba naglilinis etc..etc. Medyo irritable ang Josef pero sumusunod naman. Siguro nung hindi na nakatiis – medyo nangatwiran ang bata. Ayun na – nagsimula na magsisigaw si Tabatsing. With matching “fucking” sa mga sentences. Aiyah. Sumagot na rin ang bata – na don’t fucking raise your voice .. you are not my father. Etc..etc.. Lalong nagalit ang Tabatsoy. Narinig na siguro ni Anna ang commotion kaya lumabas na rin sya.. at pinigil si Josef. Yung ibang guardians ay nakipigil na rin. Pero ayaw paawat si Tabatsing. Walang tigil kasisigaw. Inilabas na nga nung mga male guardians papunta sa Pool … pero bumalik pa rin. And he continued to shout. Dinala na lang ni Anna si Josef papunta sa confession room… pero bago makapasok… may suntok sa pader moment pa muna ang Josef. Si Anna naman –patuloy sa pagpapakalma kay Josef – telling the boy that he needs to calm down.. not say anything.. kasi yun ang gusto ni Tabatsing. Para ma-force evict si Josef at ma-save si Kevin. Whew — good TV right? To rival the Maricris/Bea sagutan! It was riveting. The shouting… the intensity of the anger… I was at the edge of my seat. In this spectacle – one might ask - who won and who lost?

Well – John definitely lost. He was not able to control his anger. He was provoking the kid whose only sin was to oversleep — like most teenagers. He raised his voice with matching “curse words” to someone who is not his son. Actually – kahit ano mang kamalian ni Josef — John has no right to do what he did. He is not Josef’s father. If he had issues with the boy – tell it to Anna… or to Kuya. He has no right to loose his temper as – like Josef – he is also a guest in Kuya’s house. Actually – he’s just the baggage that comes with Kevin ika nga. Josef has more right to be there than him – kasi si Josef ay isang official housemate. He’s just a “plus”. What if someone did the same thing to Kevin? Matutuwa ba siya? Kung nandun ako – when he said “It’s not the Anna Show” – I would have said “It’s not the fucking John show either!”. Buti na lang at wala ako dun!

Anna earned brownie points in this kaguluhan. Kahit hate ko siya – she handled the situation well. She protected Josef. She kept her cool…. well to an extent. Galing din na mabilis siya mag-isip on how to handle Josef. For a few minutes – she reminded us that she may be a bitch — but first and foremost – she’s a mother.

Josef earned points as well. Kung hindi lang itinigil ang botohan — he would have surely won by a mile. Who wouldn’t vote for him – here’s this boy – with this image na pasaway – able to hold his temper for as long as he can. It has sympathy votes written all over it – not that he needs it based on the result of the first eviction votes. Sinagot man nya si John – it does not matter. He was provoked by the big tub of lard. For sure – marami ang nakarelate sa panggigising de gulat ni John kay Josef. At one point in our life – naranasan na nating gisingin sa pamamagitan ng non-stop sermon. And I know you will all agree – it ain’t a nice feeling. Kaya nga siguro nagkaroon ng kasabihan na “Magbiro ka na sa lasing, wag sa bagong gising”. Biro pa yan ha – paano kung instead na Biro — maging si Padre Damaso ito na nagdada-dakdak at nagmumumura. Aiyah. If I was in Josef’s position – kinuha ko yung frying pan na pinapalinis sa akin — at ipinukpok ko sa bunganga ni Damaso! With matching – will you fucking shut your fucking mouth! Again – buti na lang at wala ako dun.

Pero for me – the one who emereged as the winner – is Mang Erning. Gulat kayo no? Unexpected. Bakit? Meron kasi siyang sinabi na para sa akin summarizes all that happened. “Wala ako pakelam kahit magpatayan silang dalawa, ang sa akin lang wag idamay yung bata. Kung ikaw ang magulang tapos makikita mo ginaganun ng ibang tao anak mo, ano mararamdaman mo?”. Di ba? Punong-puno ng wisdom! Simple pero may dating. Just like Mang Erning. Simple lang – pero rock.

I know that this won’t be the last gulo ng mga guardians. Siguro – hangga’t nasa loob sina John at Anna – things will always be interesting. If one of them leaves – malamang magkaroon ng kaunting katahimikan. Yung ibang guardians kasi ay matiisin. They try their best na makisama sa iba at maiwasan ang anumang kaguluhan. The other day – Kuya informed the housemates of the problem between the guardians. And he asked them to find a way to solve this problem. Hmm.. Parang isa itong irony. The guardians are there to guide the teen housemates. But with the way things are happening – parang it’s the other way around. Ano ito – a case of guarding the guardians?

P.S.

My Big Four sa Guardians… Mang Erning for the big win… then Jolas’ father Mang Ike, Alex’s mother… and Nan’s mother My Love. Bakit? Kasi – they have shown that they are guardians through and through… ano man ang mangyari…

Teen Update

PBB Teen Edition Plus is getting interesting by the minute. So far – this season is way better than first Teen Edition snooze-fest. They are currently on their 5^th week inside the house — and the fangs are coming out. O sa Lobo yun? Hmm..

The teen housemates are an okay bunch. Wala naman masyadong surprises. They are your typical teens acting like how typical teens act. (Well — except for a couple of them but that is purely a subjective and biased observation.). Away bati over trivial things like chores or amount of attention or effort in the weekly task. Madalas ang tampuhan pero kaunting sorry at ngiti lang ay bati na naman. Their conversations usually revolves around family, lovelife, school and friends. If you are looking for something deep and meaningful – well you maybe in the wrong place. Not that they are all airheads and bimbos — they are an intelligent group — but they are teenagers nontheless. However – once in a while – may mga moments din naman sila na they do show maturity way beyond their age. As expected – you get to see “loveteams”. Hindi na naman ito bago. Some teens have significant others sa outside world but can’t help but build “friendships” with other housemates. Naku – if you get to read the forums – kulang na lang i-crucify yung mga teens for being malandi, babaero etc…etc. Ako – I don’t particularly agree with it – but who are we to judge. These teens are inside one house, seeing each other 24X7. Hindi naman kabigla-bigla na may magkakagustuhan. Sa overnight camping nga – may nagkakadevelopan – ito pang weeks na nakakulong sa isang bahay. How about the significant others outside – well.. they have to bear with it. They can let go – or hold on. They’re young. It’s not the end of the world. It’s cruel – but it’s the truth. Your relationship is doomed the minute your significant other entered the house. Hello – yung ngang matatanda sa ibang season nagkakagustuhan. Ito pang mga teenagers. Siguro – it’s part of the life lessons sa bahay ni kuya.

Housemates update? Hmm.. okay. Beauty is still my favorite. I particularly like her unguarded moments. Kahit na nag-eemote na biglang may sasabihin sya na nakakatawa. She’s a joy to watch. Josef is also a favorite. Sobrang kulit. Mapagbiro kaya lagi tuloy nanonominate. He’s like everyone’s typical little bro who is always into mischief pero adorable pa rin. Marami nagsasabi na he’s playing a game — specifically with the loveteam angle. Well… I don’t think so. Mahirap kasing i-fake yung mga glances when you think nobody is looking. Marami syang mga little actions which gives him away. How about the GF outside? Well – only he can decide. Malay natin – wala na rin palang GF na babalikan. I am beginning to like Alex as well. Nung una – para kasing gimik ang pagpapatuli. Well – it may or may not be. We’ll never know. Pero what won me over is his character. He is such a sweet kid. Napakalambing nya sa Nanay nya. He is well liked by all of the housemates. Malaking add-on din ang mga nakakatuwang Beauty/Alex moments hehehehe. Wala lang – I find their tampuhan blues cute. Parang mga bata. Nicole is a puzzle. She seems to come alive whenever Josef is around. Pero pag tinanggal mo si Josef – she goes back to being mahiyain at di palasalita. I like the NicoSef moments. But as Nicole — she still needs to show who she really is. Valerie is quite charming. Natutuwa ako sa mga reactions nya.. and pag pinipilit nyang magsalita ng Tagalog. She’s a pretty face – but I am not yet sure if she can be more.

We can now go to the “I don’t particulary care if they get evicted” list. Jolas – hmm… hmmm…. Hmmm. I only have 1 opinion on this guy – he needs to get a personality. I actually wanted him out – since nandun man sya or wala – pareho lang. Nan – I am not sure kung anong papel nya sa bahay. He was suppose to be the funny one. Funny looking - pwede…. Funny –funny? Maybe. His “You get it. You have hands. And you have feet. To get and to walk…” quip is hilarious. The way he say it — priceless! Pero other than this – parang wala pa akong masyadong nakikita. Priscilla at Ejay– di ko sila magets. At wala rin akong maisulat tungkol sa kanila. Kevin – one advice – get out of the house. Medyo irritable ako sa teen housemate na ito. Parang hindi sya marunong tumanggap ng pagkatalo. Pag nominated sya – he turns into this Spanish cry baby na akala mo pinagkaisahan ng mundo. Hello – get down from your high horse and face reality. It’s a game – at the end of it all – someone needs to get nominated — and eventually evicted.

Last of the housemates – the “I don’t really like housemates”. Robi and Rona – RoRo as they are fondly called. Let’s start with Robi — if someone will say to me that there’s one teen housemate really playing the game – my first bet is Robi. I sense something unnatural with this guy. The tagalong quotable quotes is just plain ridiculous. His “Alam nyo naman ako – ang unang kong iniisip ay kayo” (or something to that effect) – almost made me gag. Hello. Hindi ka naman masyadong pa-hero effect nyan. Pag nagasalita sya – I can’t help but think kung gaano sya katagal nagpraktis. Pag may mga issues or nagmomoment – he says things one would want to hear – a lot of crap. A sign of maturity? Well.. perhaps. Or maybe he’s just smart enough to know the game to play. Si Rona naman – she reminds me of Hermione Granger before she became Harry and Ron’s friend - annoying. Kung nasa high school tayo – siya yung nasa unahan lagi nakaupo, nagpapakamatay mag-taas ng kamay during recitation at hindi nagpapakopya pag may exam. She’s your typical Little Miss Perfect. There was this instance when Kuya “punished” them kunwari dahil sa hindi sila malinis sa bahay. The other teens accepted the punishment — except si Ms. Wikipedia. Talagang mega-analyze siya kung bakit sya nasama sa parusa. Hindi nya matanggap na kasamaa sya. Sarap ngang sabihan na Miss… tigilan nyo na ang pag-oover analyze. Unecessary stress lang yan. Tulad ni Robi – paleader effect sya sa mga task. Like Robi – pag may mga issues at nagmomoment – alam na alam nya ang sasabihin. Its clichés flying everywhere — para tuloy hindi na kapani-paniwala. Bagay na bagay sila ni Robi —- sana magkatuluyan sila. Yun nga lang – kung sakaling magkaanak sila – yun na siguro ang pinaka-serious na bata ever.

Big four —- I would like Beauty, Josef, Alex and either Nicole or Valerie. Kahit hindi ko sya gusto – I think Robi will be in the finals. If the big four will be chosen right at this moment – it will be Beauty, Josef, Robi and Nicole. Kung ito ngang apat na ito ang magiging big four sa dulo — it will be a very good fight. Will the Ateneo and La Salle rivalry be fierce enough to translate into votes? Maguubusan ba ng pera ang magkabilang kampo? O hanggang sigawan lang sa UAAP games ang kaya ng dalawang unibersidad na ito. All the past winners are from the south — will we see another big winner from the same region? Will the Visayas and Mindanao vote catapult either Beauty or Nicole to be the big teen winner? Or will this split the regional votes like what happened to Panky and Jay-ar in PDA?

P.S.

Is there a place for the “out and proud” uncircumcised teen Kevin in showbusiness? Or he will be forced to face the scissors – para lang hindi na matanong ng tungkol dito?

Rice Shortage, Customer Service and Anniversaries

1. Malaking balita ngayon sa Pinas ang Rice Crisis. Mega-pila ang lahat para sa murang NFA rice. Marami din ang nakikisawsaw sa issue. Ang mga Oposisyon – as expected sinisisi si Ate Glow. Ang Administrasyon – as expected ay sinasabing Global problem ito. Marami ring mga experts ang nagbibigay ng kanilang opinion dahil sa expert daw sila. Ang media naman – exploit to the max ang drama. In true news sensationalism – ang ipapakita nila ay yung mga batang may uhog na walang tsinelas na nakapila para bumili ng bigas. O kaya naman ay yung mga magulang na madungis at may dala-dalang 10 anak na ang isa ay kasisilang pa lang – pumipila sa init ng araw para lang makabili ng murang bigas. Parang ang sarap tanungin – alam nyo namang mahirap ang buhay – bakit naman naka-sampu pa kayo? Sino ba ang asawa nyo at masyado yatang irresistible? Ate naman — mukhang nangangailangan kayo ng bagong hobby – how about ice skating?

2. Tungkol pa rin sa bigas – tutal marami nang nakikisawsaw — sama na rin ako. May theory ako kung bakit may rice shortage. Ang punot’ dulo nito ay ang gumagandang ekonomiya ng Pilipinas. Dahil dumarami ang pera ng tao at medyo nagiging wise na sila – feel nilang mag-invest sa property. Dahil dito – boom ang property business. Dahil boom ang property business — maraming construction. Pag maraming construction – maraming construction worker. Ayan – dahil dyan may rice shortage. Ha? Anong kuneksiyon. Nakita nyo na bang kumain ng kanin ang mga construction worker? Di ba nagkaroon na nga ng kasabihan na “Para kang construction worker kung kumain!”. Kunwari ang isang construction worker ay kayang kumain ng 5 kilong bigas sa isang araw. Nung wala pang property boom – 100 ang construction worker…. Nung nagkaroon ng property boom – naging 1,000 ang construction worker – biro mo yun… multiplied by 10 ang nadagdag sa pangangailangan ng bigas. Paano namang hindi magkaka-shortage. And mind you – hindi ko pa isinali dyan yung mga nilalang na hindi naman construction worker — pero kung kumain ay parang construction worker. Ouch. Buti na lang nandito ako sa Land of Kaya toast. Hindi ako kasali sa dahilan ng rice shortage dyan sa Pinas.

3. I was in this sosyalin store a few weeks ago. Wala lang – patingin tingin … at walang planong bumili. Gusto ko lang malaman ang mga presyo at pagkatapos ay isipin na – mahal naman – bibili na lang ako ng bagong cellphone. Dahil sa mahal ang mga paninda sa store na yun – halos walang namimili. Ang dami tuloy oras nung mga store clerks na sundan ka san ka man pumunta. Pag may hinawakan akong damit — may biglang magsasalita – sir.. we also have those in different colors…. and we have sizes from small to are you kidding me! Hmm… mukhang maalam si ate. Subukan ko nga tumingin ng ibang item. Aba – alam pa rin. Hmm… e kung ito ang piliin ko. Aba alam pa rin. Dahil sa feeling ko ay mayroon akong anino kahit na wala namang araw – I politely said – sorry.. just browsing. Aba – singbilis pa ni Flash na nawala si Ate. Yun pala ang magic word. Hmm.. masubukan nga sa ibang stores.

4. Related pa rin sa Customer service – may mga tindahan ngayon na masyadong isinasa-puso ang Customer in Focus. Minsan pagpasok mo pa lang – mayroon nang isang sales clerk ang susunod-sunod sa yo saan ka man magpunta. Para bang isang anino na lagi mong kasama. Madalas sa hindi – medyo nakakainis ito. Lalo na kung wala ka naman talagang plano bumili at nag-uubos ka lang ng oras… o kaya naman ay nagpapalamig dahil sa sobrang init sa outside world. I once saw a feature ng isang tindhan sa States wherein upon entry ay may ibibigay na tag sa customer. Pwedeng mamili ang customer if gusto nya ng may entourage (sundan ng sundan ng store assistants) o gusto nyang mapag-isa (walang lalapit sa kanya kahit mabagsakan man sya ng iskaparate). I think this is a wonderful idea. Para sa ganun – hindi na kailangan pang manghula ng mga store assistants kung sino ang mga ksp at sino ang mga loner. Feeling ko – that’s customer service!

5. Happy Anniversary to me! Yup. Today is the first year anniversary of my blogging. It’s such a momentous event – if you know me – alam nyong my attention span is very short. Madali akong magsawa sa mga bagay-bagay. And here I am – celebrating my first blogging anniversary!! Anong wish ko – more years of blogging… more people reading my blogs… and of course…world peace!

Kwento ni Soosie - Kwento mo rin?

Mayroon akong kwento… kwento ng isang Pinoy. — itago natin sya sa pangalang – Soosie. Bakit Soosie? Wala lang. Gusto ko lang na Soosie. Bakit ka ba nakikialam. Kung ayaw mo nang pangalang Soosie – i-cut paste mo ang story na ito sa isang word document at i-replace ang Soosie ng kung ano mang pangalan na gusto mo. Ok? Wag mo akong simulan. Mainit ang ulo ko.

Nasan na tayo – okay… si Soosie ay isang typical na Pinoy. Nangangarap sya na bigyan ng magandang kinabukasan ang kanyang pamilya (ama, ina, mga kapatid, asawa ng mga kapatid, mga pamangkin, tito, tita, friends, neighbors and other countrymen). Upang matupad ang pangarap na ito ay nagbakasakali sya at nangibang bansa. Swerte naman at nakakuha sya offer para magtrabaho sa Singapore bilang mananahi. Masayang-masaya si Soosie. May trabaho na sya – ito na ang simula ng pagtupad nya sa kanyang mga pangarap- bukod sa magandang buhay sa kanyang pamilya (ama, ina, mga kapatid, asawa ng mga kapatid, mga pamangkin, tito, tita, friends, neighbors and other countrymen) – maari na rin syang makabili ng ilang pang mga pangangailangan tulad ng Ipod touch, Iphone, macbook pro, nintendo wii, Nikon D90, Sony HD TV, Sony VideoCam at Sony PSP. Tulad ng daang-daang Pilipino dito sa Singapore – pumasok si Soosei bilang contractual. Isang taon ang kontrata nya – renewable depende sa mood ng kumpanyang papasukan nya – at lagay ng loveteam nina Fann Wong at Christopher Lee. Pero dahil sa mas mataas naman ang matatanggap nya kaysa sa manahi sa Pinas – kinareer na nya ito. Tinanggap na ang oportunidad at nagpasalamat sa swerteng ibinigay sa kaniya.

Baon ang sipag at tiyaga – lulan ng budget airline – lumipad si Soosie. Si Soosie ay na-assign na manahi sa isang multinational na financial company. Ano tatahiin nya sa financial company? Basta… sabihin na lang natin na meron. Tuwang-tuwa si Soosie. Sinabihan sya ng ahente nya na the client expects her to work ng mabilis, simple lang, may kalidad, mula simula hanggang wakas. Tulad ng mga batang contestant ng Little Big Star — nangako sya na gagawin nya ang kaniyang best.

Sa pagdaan ng mga araw — nagpursige si Soosie. Trabaho to the max ang Soosie. Overtime to the max sya kahit walang bayad ang overtime. Ang mahalaga – matapos ang mga tahiin . Ilang buwan ang nagdaan – sinabihan si Soosie ng kliyente na natutuwa ito sa pagtratrabaho nya ng mabuti. Bilang gantimpala ay gagawin nya itong mananahi na on-call 24X7. Pero wag syang mag-alala – may dagdag naman na 100 dolyar kada buwan bilang allowance. Nais man nyang tumanggi – ay walang nagawa si Soosie. Mula noon – hindi na nakakatulog ng malalim si Soosie. Bakit? Dahil sa alam nyang kahit na anong oras ay maari syang tawagan para manahi. At hindi pwedeng hindi mo ito sagutin agad — dahil ito ay sewing emergency. Kung hindi mo ito masasagot – malulugi ang kumpanya!

Unti-unti nang naiisip ni Soosie na mukhang medyo dehado sya. Biro mo – bukod sa normal nyang 9:00-7:00 na pasok (na kadalasn ay extended to 9:00 to 10:00 – without pay)… pwede pa syang tawagan kahit anong oras… kadalasan ay madaling araw. Di lang yan — pati weekends at public holiday kasama. Pero dahil sa isa syang Pinoy – at sanay sya na kinakawawa bago ang magwagi (Mara-Clara syndrome) - pinagpatuloy lang nya ang pagtratrabaho. Inisip na lang nya – kailangan ng bagong Rayban ni Boy … bagong Gameboy ni Girlie, Crocs ni Tatay, Gucci bag ni Nanay, Banana Republic na shirts sa mga in-laws, Barbie doll ng mga pamangakin at Imported na sabon at shampoo para sa others. Dahil sa sobrang sipag ni Soosie – ay napansin siya ng kanyang amo. Isang araw – ay muli sya nitong kinausap – “Soosie… Lah! You work so hard what. Your work is good. No mistakes. Because of this – I will give to you more work.! You need to help Worker 1 and Worker 2 as well. They don’t do good job. You do good job! Good job! Lah”. As usual — wala na namang nasabi si Soosie. Medyo nagtagal kasi bago nawala ang shock na naranasan nya. Ganun? Dahil sa masipag sya at mapagkakatiwalaan – dadagdagan pa ang trabaho nya? Hindi man lang sya sinabihan na dadagdagan ng sweldo! Aiyah. Riddikulus! Este… ridicoulous pala. Pero kung may magic lang nga sigro si Soosie – baka na-transfigure na nya ang amo nya para maging isang bato. Sarap ibato e.

Pero dahil sa katatanggap lang nyang sulat na nangangailangan si Pinsan ng sponsor dahil tumatakbo itong Lakambini ng Baranggay Kurimaw — tinanggap na rin ito ni Soosie. Ano pa ang magagawa nya – she looked at the positive side – dapat maging proud pa nga sya dahil nakita ng amo nya ang sipag at tiyaga Personal satisfaction yun. Something na di mababayaran ng pera. Na-inspire tuloy lalo si Soosie na magtrabaho pang mabuti. Bukod sa normal nyang trabaho – naging tagalinis na rin sya nung mga kalat na ginagawa nung dalawa pa nyang trabaho. Okay lang yan – sabi nya sa sarili nya. Ang importante ay sumusweldo. Work hanrd … and for sure… rewards will follow. Malay mo – mapermanente na sya. E di dadami ang kanyang leave, magkakaroon na rin sya ng mga benefits at syempre matatawag na siyang Mam. Mam Soosie. Aba. May dating.

Isang araw – pinatawag silang lahat ng ahente nila. May ibabalita daw. Ano? Ano? Ang pagtaas ng bilihin? Pagtaas ng bayad sa renta? Pagtaas ng kuryente? Pamasahe? Ticket sa Sine? Yun lang kasi ang madalas na laman ng balita. Hehehe. Tawanan silang mga contractuals. Hindi daw – sabi ng ahente nila. May bagong patakaran daw. Babawasan ng kalahati ang allowance nila. What????? Bakit? Basta daw. Bagong patakaran! Kailangan sundin. Maswerte pa nga daw sila. Dahil yung mga bagong darating ay wala nang allowance! Shock ulit si Soosie — ganun? Binawasan na nga — kami pa dapat mag-thank you?

Unti-unting namula si Soosie. Nanginig ang kanyang kalamnan. Umusok ang kanyang tenga. Saka sya napasigaw ng “ I love you Piollooooooooo!” … este “Hindeeeeeee maaaarrrrrriiiiiiii itooooooooooooooo!!!!!!”. Tama Na! Sobra Na!”. Napatingin ang lahat kay “Soosie. Soosie? Is that you? Marunong ka palang sumigaw?” – yan ang sabi ng lahat kay Soosie. Tiningnan ni Soosie ang lahat ng mga kasamang contractual…. Sabay sabing — “Panahon na para matapos itong pang-aapi sa atin! Kailangan tayong kumilos! Kailangan malaman nila ang ating saloobin! Kung kaya’t….. susulat ako ng email!”. Palakpakan ang lahat. Ang tapang na talaga ni Soosie.

Dear Sir:

What you are doing is not fair. We are working hard and should be compensated accordingly. But – instead – you are removing our measly benefits. This is not fair.

Love lots,

Soosie

Dear Soosie,

Life is not fair.

Your Sir,

Taning

Hindi makapaniwala si Soosie. Sino bang tao ang hindi makokonsensiya pag pinadalhan ng e-mail? It was a gutsy move on her side ika nga. Pero wa epek kay bossing. Sabagay – naiisip ni Soosie – umalis man ako — napakaraming Pilipino ang nakapila upang pumalit sa pwesto kong ito. Swerte na nga sya. Kahit naapi. Kahit naiisahan. Pasalamat nga sya at binigyan pa sya ng trabaho. Pero minsan – importante din yung respeto sa sarili. Pag hindi pa siya umalis sa trabahong ito. Baka hindi na nya irespeto pa ang kaniyang sarili. Tama. Uuwi na lang sya sa Pilipinas at duon mananahi. She will be the best mananahi ever! — medyo pagmomoment ni Soosie.

Taas no… tumay si Soosie sa kaniyang upuan. Haharapin nya ang ahente nya… ang amo nya. Sasabihin nyang – I resign!. May yabang na naglakad si Soosie patungo sa opisina ng amo nya. Bubuksan na nya ang pinto nang biglang tumunog ang cellphone nya. May SMS si Girlie. Naku baka importante.

“ATE. PBLI NMN AK NG BGONG GUESS NA WTCH. PA-BDAY MO NA SA AKN. YNG DW CAR STEREO NI TATY. KHT MDYO LUMNG MDL. BSTA PWDE MAGPLAY NG BLU RAY. SI NANAY PALA. SIZE 6 DW SA PRADA SHOES. KW NA MAMILI DHL MGNDA NMN TASTE MO. SNA TITA/TITO PWDE NA DW NG JHNY WLKR. INGT KA DYN. WE LUV U”

Epilogue

Dear Soosie

You are doing a good job. Congratulations. Because you are doing a good job — please help Worker 3 and Worker 4 .

By the way – effective today – we will be removing the allowance.

Your Sir,

Taning

San na nga ba? San na nga ba? San na nga bang barkada ngayon?

This Apo Hiking Society song was very popular during my high school days. Gusto ko itong kanta ito kasi maganda ang lyrics and simple lang ang timpla ng melody. Yun lang.

Fast forward to present day. For the past few months – I have been exchanging mails with three of my high school chums. Wala lang. Kumustahan. Laitan. Tsismisan. At syempre reminiscing. For the past week or so – napunta ang usapan naming sa mga nakakatawang pangyayari nung high school pa kami. Mga misadventures… first impressions… fashion don’ts… at kung ano-ano pa. Pagkatapos naming pagtawanan ang isa’t-isa ng slight at laitin till the high heaven ang ibang di kasama sa usapan — a question suddenly pop in my mind. Eto kaming apat at tawa ng tawa — pero nasan na nga ba yung iba? Nasan na nga ba? Nasan na nga ba ang barkada ngayon?

I started drafting a mail — where I listed down all my high school barkadas. Isa-isa ko ding inisip when was the last time we communicated with each other – personal man, via phone or mail (both e and snail). The list made me a little sad. Karamihan – years ago pa nung huli kong makita. Yung iba – I last saw them nung High School graduation.. It was really really sad. Iniisip ko nga how did we end up like this. We were like brothers and sisters nung high school. Ngayon – maswerte na kung may mabalitaan ka about them — or makita mo ang picture nila sa friendster accounts nila… o matsismis sa rumor mill…. One can’t help but ask —ano nga ba nangyari?

Well — life happened. Its like a tale as old as time. Formed a strong bond during high school — magkakasama sa kalokohan — magkakaramay sa kalungkutan. Each promised to be a friend till the end — ika nga ng mga kabataan ngayon – BFF! Then high school ended and College began — everyone promised to keep in touch. Well — some kept their promise for a while — there are the cheery mails… phone calls…. Get together pag nagkataong nasa probinsya ang lahat. After four years - college ended. Everyone was forced to face the real world. Real life na kung baga — wala na ang protection ng 4 walls of the school — it’s a dog-eat-dog word and everyone was forced to survive. Nawala na ang paminsan-minsan. Nagsimula na kasi ang bagong buhay ng lahat. Yung quest for successful careers.. Mga nagseryoso sa lovelife… Migrating to other countries…. The continued quest of earning a decent living.

Siguro ganun talaga. Siguro talagang darating ang panahon na mawawala ang mga kaibigan. Siguro ito ang dahilan kung bakit nauso ang pag-aasawa. Yung pagpapakasal. Naninigurado yung mga ninuno natin that they’ll never end up alone. Pwede naman na humayo na lang sila at nagpakarami — pero hindi – pinauso nila ang pagpapakasal. Iba na nga naman ang sigurado.

Pagkatapos ng pag-momoment na ito – I can’t help but be thankful. Biro nyo – I have three friends from high school who I am in constant communications with. A few na once or twice a year ay nakakamustahan ko. Nandyan din ang mga college friends… friends from Pinas… friends dito sa land of ban mian. Maswerte pa rin ako – marami man ang nawala – marami man ang hindi ko na nakikita or nakakausap… yun namang mga tao who really matters have decided to stay…. BFF? Sana… pero mahirap magsabi ng forever e…. kasi alam naman nating lahat may katapusan.

Looking back – high school seems like ages ago. Hindi ko na nga kilala kung sino ako noon. Ang alam ko na lang ay kung sino ako ngayon.

Temporary Realization

Meron akong realization today. Medyo mahirap siguro intindihin ito ng ibang mga nilalang – lalo na yung mga nilalang na hindi naman ako kilala. Ika nga – yung mga napadaan lang sa blog site na ito kasi nag google ng something insanely perverted at surprise-surprise — dinala dito sa site na ito. Which I find it odd — dahil wala naman akong sinusulat na hindi pang PG. Hmmm… Pero that’s another case.

Anyway – balik sa realization. Brief background — balik-tanaw sabi nga ng iba. Ako ngayon ay nasa land of “Dull as a button local franchise Deal or No Deal show” working for a multinationational financial company. (Bakit sa mga wanted ads… lagi na lang nakalagay na Multinational firm or company – sabagay.. maganda pakinggan. Pag tinanong ka – Where are you working? Oh… I work for a multination firm. Di ba? Galing… kahit na tagabukas ka lang ng pinto – at least multinational…..) Few years back – dahil sa wala nang ibang nilalang – my supervisor was forced to assign me sa isang malaki at high profile na proyekto. Feeling “newbie” ako that time. Here I am – with no significant project management experience whatsoever assigned in the big leagues. Ibang level na kung baga. Syempre I was scared as a kid going to school the first time. Pero syempre hindi ko pinapahalata. I was smug and indifferent —- para magmukhang I belong. I was learning and at the same time pretending that I know everything. Hindi kasi pwede na medyo pa-eng-eng eng-eng. You’ll be eaten alive. You’ll be bullied by the alpha dogs… and cats… and the occasional skunks. It’s a dog-eat-dog project ika nga. Every eyes are on you waiting for you to fail — to drop the ball. Pero syempre – the hard-headed pig in me would not let this happen. I have never worked so hard in my life. I stretched myself to near limit. 7 days work-week? Late nighters? Making the impossible possible? No problemo. Even I am quite amaze of what I was able to do once I put my heart and soul on something. I was so damn proud of myself.

After a year or so of trying to be Mr. Incredible – medyo napapaisip na ako. Kahit kasi ano ang gawin ko – my boss would often find it lacking. Kung may mga magandang papuri – trabaho ko naman daw talaga yun so dapat ko lang gawin. Pag nakikita ko yung ibang mga kateam ko na papetiks-petiks lang — medyo naiisip ko na why am I doing this? Bakit kailangan ko patayin ang sarili ko e pwede naman pala na pacute-cute lang. Mind you – I got the same salary increment as the other people from my team. Sabi nga ni bossing – may increment ako kasi I was doing rather well. Pero yung iba may increment – para may incentive sila to work harder. Hmmmm.. Kuya – parang may mali po yata? Ibig sabihin – you will be rewarded if you do a good job — and will be rewarded for you to step-up and do a better job? Lagi ko nga sinasabi na – I will slow down. Pero pag dumarating na ang mga deadlines – nawawala ang planong mag-slow down. I’d rather work till I die than to feel that I am a failure — which is comparable to dying. Medyo mga ilang panahon ang lumipas – I decided it’s time to go… Tama na.. Sobra na.. Palitan na. Kahit low on funds – rich naman ako sa conviction na kailangan na umalis. Kaso — di natuloy. Yup – nagsabi ako. Pero di natuloy. Kinausap kasi ako ni bossing. After a couple of hours ng pag-uusap — lumabas ako ng meeting room feeling like the greatest quitter there ever is. Di ko pala nabanggit – may kakaibang skill ang aking bossing na kaya nyang paikot-ikotin ang lahat at gawing kamalian mo ang lahat. Ano ang napag-usapan naming – in a nut shell — I am insecure… I don’t think that I am in the same league as the other AVPs and VPs dahil sa isa lang akong lowly contractual employee. Kailangan ko pa ibuild-up ang aking confidence. Me? Lacking in confidence? Well… kung tutuo nga – that’s a first! The sad thing was – I believed all of it while we were talking inside the small office with four walls. He also mentioned that I just need to work hard and the rewards will follow. Hmmm….nung medyo nahimasmasan na ako — napag-isip ulit ako. Am I not working hard? Kulang pa rin? Hmmm ulit.

Just to prove him wrong — work like a dog ulit ako. Continue lang ako with my smug and indifferent act since it is working. I worked harder than I already did. Pero oks pa din. Pero since nothing have changed — hindi mawala-wala ang katanungan sa aking isipan. Why am I doing this? What’s the point? For the second time — I decided it’s time to go. Bago ko sya kausapin — nagrehearse na ako. Hindi ko hahayaan na paikutin ulit ako. Insecure? Hindi na nya pwede ibato ito —- sa sobranng secure ko – pati sya inaaway ko! Confidence? Lacking is not the term now – overflowing pwede pa. Hmp. Pero I was not ready for what was to happen. The cunning devil was again ahead of me. He knows that the last approach will not work anymore…. So binago nya. Yup. Hindi pa rin ako nakaalis — technically. He offered that I go on sabbatical leave. Kailangan ko lang daw siguro magpahing – take it easy… then go back. I was not ready for that. Ano pa sasabihin ko? It was a good offer – go on leave — unpaid man – then go back. Hmmm.. Ok. Fine. I would go on leave — naisip ko… Baka nga naman tama sya. Baka kailangan ko lang magpahinga.

I took a couple of months off. Pahinga ng kaunti… Travel ng kaunti… Gastos ng marami. Pagkatapos maubos ang salapi… naramdaman ko na ang need to work. Just like Mc Arthur — I returned. I was gone for 2 months – nung balikan ko ang dati kong trabaho — it seems that I never left. Yung mga iniwan kong problema — problema pa rin. Nadagdagan pa nga. Nothing was sorted out. I was pissed to the heavens. There goes the two months of lazying around. I need to work doubly hard. Hmp. Kung hindi lang masaman ang pumatay – pinatay ko yung nag-takeover sa work ko e. All he did was create more mess – and I was the freaking person assigned to clean it up. Hello!!!! Last I checked - IT po ako work – hindi Metro Aide! Surprisingly – I was able to catch up really fast. In a couple of weeks – after reading thousands of mails - I am officially back. I am again in my element. Balik trabaho — balik sa old routine. Work till wee hours of the night… 7 days workweek… business trips… etc..etc… Same-same ikaw nga. For a few months – everything was fine and dandy. Pero sabi nga nila — nothing is too good to last eternally. After a year – I finally decided that it is really time to go. Pramis. True na. Time to go na talaga. I… again…. Informed…again… bossing that the day has come. This is it na talaga. As in. He tried to talk me out of it — pero it’s either nabawasan na ang kanyang powers or I just really feel that its time to move on. I left a month or so after.

Tulad ng mga dating pangyayari – medyo easy easy muna ako…. Pahinga ulit…. Travel kaunti…. Gastos ng marami…. I was planning to find another job after a couple of months of doing nothing. Well — I did try to find a job after a couple of months — nga lang — the job market was terrible. Siyudad was letting go of contract staff every hour by the hour. Dami tuloy naghahanap ng work – and the pickings are rather slim. Syempre pag sobrang dami ng demand — nagmamaganda ang mga agents. There are job offers but at half of what you are usually receiving. Ano kayo.. swerte? Hmp. I can always go back to siyudad — ang huling sabi ni bossing – no matter what the situation of the job market… kahit nagtatanggalan.. he will always have a slot open for me. Touch naman ako that time — and I almost dialed his number and shout for help. Pag unti-unti mo nang nakikita na nauubos ang iyong kaperahan — way –way below your psychological limit (I have a psychological limit on my savings… pag medyo less than the psych limit na…. medyo napapraning na ako… ) Buti na lang — an offer came unexpectedly. The offer is good… it’s for a lower position… pay is a little lower to what I was earning before….but somehow may spider senses are tingling. Hmm…. I made a final demand – nervously. Biro mo – psychotic level savings, bad job market, rising prices – at nagpapagwapo pa ako. Surprisingly — their counter offer is quite ok.. not what I was demanding – but reasonable. I accepted the job. Pag medyo nag-read back kayo ng mga first entries ko — you would know kung ano ang nangyari. But hey – may maganda namang naging resulta – kung hindi ako nagtrabaho dun — I would not have written my first blog entry …. and you would not be reading this entry? So okay na rin di ba?

Ano now – balik na tayo sa present day… sa now… Whew… mahaba-habang pagbabalik tanaw yun a. Anyway – this afternoon — a collegue from my previous team… Ano? Anong team? Naku — tamad mag-back read…. I resigned after 6 months… returned to my first company… but in another team…. Yada..yada…yada… Ok? So… a former teammate called asking something about the first big project (so now alam nyo na – na big talaga ang project… daming nang nangyari sa buhay nating lahat .. pero yung project na yun ay project pa rin.) that I handled. And that’s the time I had my realization.

Anong realization? I realized that I do missed working for that project. All it took was once simple question … And yun – singtulin ng takbo ni Andress ni Bonifacio nung A-putol A t*t* — my mind recalled the past few years… trying to remembering the exact details for that requirement. Biglang nag-flash sa aking isipan – who was involved in that requirement…when was this requirement discussed… why was this requirement highlighted. Parang biglang nagising ang aking natutulog na isipan. I was running on pure adrenaline. I never felt so alive.. Pramis. I looked backed at my old mails (I kept it… would you believe?) – and with precision — was able to find the specific mail that will save my former team from extreme agony and pain. Katuwa di ba? Namimis ko na rin pala to work on something that really matters. Yung kailangan talaga pag-iisipan. Yung may sense of extreme fulfillment. Yung something that you can look back and feel proud.

Ano ibig sabihin nito? That I hate what I am doing now? No… not really. I hate a few people… but kung kilala nyo ako – hindi na ito bago. Do I regret leaving? No. Kung hindi ako umalis – I would have not experience yung mga bagay na nagawa ko while I was away from Siyudad. Kung hindi ako umalis – hindi ko maconfirm na I was underpaid and overworked. I would not have known what I am truly worth. I can’t say I am fully contented – but I am happy where I am. Life’s been good this past few months – and I plan to enjoy it while I can… Papaano na ang realization? Well…. I am charging it to temporary insanity… a temporary realization. J